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Love, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage
by
Angie Lewis
Love, sex, and intimacy are essential components that
great marriages require for complete stability. Real love is the
spiritual aspect, sex is physical and intimacy is emotional. It would be
difficult to love your spouse if you only thought about yourself. This
is not real love. Selfish people often have a difficult time giving of
themselves, and yet, that is what love is all about. Love is more than a
feeling, it is an action, and therefore, real love takes effort and
sincerity.
LOVE:
In scripture, a husband is commanded to love his wife. What do you think
is going to happen if that love is not a sincere love for his wife? She
will feel frustration, resentment, and anger, and she will have a very
difficult time submitting herself to the man she married. When a husband
does not love his wife the way God has asked him to love his wife, all
sorts of problems will develop in the marriage, mainly rebelliousness,
and selfish thinking.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the Church and gave
himself up for her, to make her holy, cleansing her by washing with
water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant
church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and
blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their
own bodies. He who loves his wife, love himself. Ephesians 5:25-28
Husbands are commanded to love their wife for a very beautiful reason.
It brings about the ideal biblical marriage that God designed himself.
Marriage is a holy union, and a living symbol that needs
self-sacrificing care. A husband should be willing to sacrifice
everything, including himself, for his wife. He should make her well
being of prime importance to him. Meaning, do whatever it takes to
protect, care for, and love her, without expecting anything in return. I
do not think there is a woman on this planet that if loved by their
husband in this way, would fear submitting to him if he treated her in
this way!
SEX:
Sex between a man and a woman in marriage can be a totally beautiful
experience when real love is felt and acted upon. The sexual
relationship can be a healthy and productive when both husband and wife
feel good about their designated roles and positions in the marriage.
Why do some women feel that all their husbands ever want or care about
is sex? If a husband is neglecting certain areas in the marriage where a
woman needs to feel like a woman and feel good about who she is, then
she will feel exploited and abused by her man sexually.
A woman who feels neglected in the love department will not want to have
sex with her husband. A woman, who knows that she is loved in ALL areas
of marriage, will not have a hard time taking pleasure in having sex
with the man she married. She will not have a difficult time initiating
the lovemaking either.
This is precisely why God says for a man to love his wife as Christ does
the church because if a woman rejects her husband sexually, what do you
think he is going to do? That's right, look elsewhere. So men, don’t
neglect your wife in any area of the marriage, give away your love
willingly, without wanting anything in return, protect, and care for
your wife, and be willing to give everything up for her and she will
submit to your love in every way imaginable to her.
INTIMACY:
Intimacy like love takes action to complete its purpose. Having a
loving, giving, and sharing relationship with the person you married
provides couples the closeness that marriage craves. The bonds of
intimacy are shared on each level in marriage from romance, to sex, to
areas of communication. Couples can feel intimate by sharing a simple
conversation with one another.
Women who are loved and feel close to their husbands are more apt to be
respectful and devoted wives. A woman who is truly loved will utilize
all of her creative talents and god given abilities that she has been
blessed with; her husband will never be in need of anything. So you can
see how, love, sex, and intimacy are all desirable attributes for a
healthy and productive marriage.
If you lack in one of the areas described above, discuss it with your
spouse, find out together what you can do to bring out the attribute you
are lacking and work on it together. I encourage you to see just how
truly unique and special your marriage can be by loving and sharing
yourself with each other on an intimate level.
About the Author:
Angie Lewis
writes on subjects such as love, sex, and intimacy between couples. Her
books center on the biblical foundations that God outlines for couples
to follow for an exceptional marriage. Angie writes numerous articles
and e-books covering such issues as adultery, addictions, temptation,
and forgiveness in marriage. See website for more information about
Angie's books or online marriage ministry.
http://www.heavenministries.com
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