|
|
The Source of "True Marriage Healing"
by
Angie Lewis
The source of "true marriage healing" lies within the
spiritual aspects of who we are. How do I know this? Because I've been
to marriage counseling, and I have read all the self-help marriage
books, and because, I did all the things "they say" that are supposed to
help you love who you married. But the reality of it is folks, there is
no magic pill or potion you can take, and there is no person, besides
you, that is going to heal your marriage as it is meant to be healed.
He said, she said scenarios don't work, and neither will finger pointing
and blaming one another. We can brow beat our spouse until we are blue
in the face, and we can continue to have affairs just because our
marriage is on rocky times, and we can listen to strangers tell us how
to save our marriage, but I'll tell you what, it will not make us better
people inside, so what good is all that for our marriage?
What we want and need for marriage is to be the person God intended for
us to be so we can have a better marriage. A man and a woman marriage
relationship is the four legs that support the marriage, and what you
believe for your marriage is the root of how good or bad the marriage
actually will be.
If you want to be a healthier person spiritually, and even mentally, you
need to enhance the spiritual side of who you are so you can grow into
the loving individual God wants you to become, which is the whole and
complete person you truly can be! We all have certain issues in our
lives that hold us back from attaining the spiritualism that I am
talking about. What is holding you back? That is the question?
In my book, Journey on the Roads Less Traveled, I reveal what held me
back. It is my personal testimony of dealing with alcohol addiction and
how it stunted my mental and spiritual growth process, and kept me from
loving others and myself properly. I was up there on cloud nine most of
the early years of my marriage. I eventually came down off that cloud
and grew up.
It is MY firm belief that to heal marriage according to how marriage is
to be divinely inspired and healed, we need to fix ourselves FIRST! I
don't care what some of the self-help books say, I just know this to be
true because I've been there! If our marriage isn't good, we need to
seek out the resources from the source that is going to actually do
something constructive for the marriage, right?
Man himself can set forth a standard for you to follow based on beliefs
of society and they may all seem so good and right but if they do not
come from God what use are they, really? Most man-made principles come
from God but have been twisted to fit into the standards of society,
which can sound good and right. This takes great discernment on your
part. What is right and wrong? How can you tell? Don't let the world
fool you; don't let people fool you into believing what your ears want
to hear. Look for the fruit. If there isn't any, then what good is that?
"He who tends a fig tree will eat its fruit" Proverbs 27:18. And in the
same concept, "He who tends "himself" will eat its fruits in marriage,
and whatever else he embarks on in his life.
If you originate from God, why are you looking to a mere stranger to
heal your marriage troubles? God has told us what he wants for us to do
for our marriage, but no one is following these precepts, not even those
who call themselves Christian's. If you are sinning against the marriage
in any way, how can you really expect the standards of society to save
you from yourself? Society isn't going to tell you that being unfaithful
is wrong, just as it won't tell you what is good and right for your
marriage.
Society created the things that are tempting to us and wrong for our
marriage. Immoral behavior and imagery is shoved into our face every
single day and everywhere! God desperately wants us to put on His shield
of armor and He will protect us from the evils of the outside world.
This is precisely why we need to fix our self FIRST before we can fix
anything with marriage! We do this by letting God lead us not into
temptation of society, but instead deliver us from all the evils of
society!
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full
body armor (figuratively speaking) of God so that you can take your
stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh
and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the
powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in
the heavenly realms." [Ephesians 6:10-13]
We ought not to stand proud in our sin, but rather put our head down
low, and stand humbly before God ready to give our sin(s) to Him. Now, I
certainly don't know everything there is to know about the mysteries of
God, and, like many of you, I am learning something new about the world
around me every single day. Not a day goes by that God doesn't somehow
and in some way reveal to me something new to share with others.
I have dealt with personally many of the issues most marriages go
through in a lifetime, and sometimes my marriage was a living nightmare.
But I grew out and away from what was holding me back, and I managed to
heal my marriage with the help of biblical principles. I didn't learn
how to be happy and content with myself by going to a therapist or a
marriage counselor. And I knew that I couldn't fix my marriage until I
fixed myself first. I had to stop drinking, and start to be aware of who
I was as a person and where I was in relation to being that person.
What is my purpose? Who am I? Well, I am a child of God. Well then, if I
am a child of God, then my source for comfort, happiness and marriage
healing lies then in the seed God planted in my heart, which needs only
to sprout and grow. Will the seed planted in my heart grow if I go
outside of God's boundaries for the answers to my failings, and marriage
troubles? No! I need to water the seed by staying within the boundaries
of who I am.
One day I decided I wanted to understand what having spirituality in my
life was all about, and eventually, I accepted Jesus Christ into my
life. His Spirit, the Holy Spirit is a part of my life now. This is not
something anyone can just hand over to you. Spirituality is something
that you go after and attain on your own and it takes time and spiritual
effort. Your relationship with God (Jesus Christ) is unique and special
and unlike anyone else's relationship with Him.
True Marriage Healing is not made in a week, or months, but is a gradual
growth process that husband and wife make within himself or herself. No
marriage will ever be restored until "each" spouse looks at what he can
do to change himself. Once this is attained, then and only then, can the
marriage begin to be transformed? The big change comes through when we
know who we are and what our purpose is in life. When we feel like our
life has purpose and meaning, then we can start applying that purpose
into our lives.
Many couples when they feel like there is no value or importance
attached to their life, that is when they may go outside the boundaries
of Gods precepts and search for substance through the establishments of
society. The main objective here is for couples to change the way they
value themselves and marriage and to help the marriage to grow in
positive ways.
Who are you? What is your purpose in life? The answers are where you
begin your search for the true source of marriage healing.
About the Author:
Angie Lewis is the author of Journey on the Roads Less
Traveled, a book about love, life and marriage. Angie has written a new
book, Love The Man Your Married. In her book Angie shares and answers
comments and questions from married couples about marriage related
issues that affect couples today.
The book involves all areas in marriage that couples need to know and
understand and apply for a successful marriage. This book is a most
reliable resource for married couples, from infidelity issues to
complete forgiveness. It is my hope that all couples find and begin to
utilize the biblical truths for their marriage by reading and studying
this book.
If you value your relationship with your spouse, and want to read about
positive ways to save your marriage, then this book is a must read! Pick
up a copy today!
For more information on these books visit Angie's
websites
http://www.spiritual.journeybooks.4t.com
Subscribe to get your FREE monthly newsletter so you
can learn to stay happily and forever married!
http://www.heavenministries.com
Article Source:
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Angie_Lewis
|
|
Management